Sometimes Us Mothers Are Just Human

Sometimes motherhood stinks. 

Sometimes I want to cut motherhood off in the middle of traffic and give it the middle finger. 

Sometimes I want run away, fast, jump on a plane and plant myself somewhere sunny with an umbrella drink in my hand and unlimited tacos. 

I'm sorry if that offends you but I won't apologize. 

Not today.

And that's okay. 

It doesn't make me love my children less. 

It makes me human. 

It doesn't mean I'm going to do it. 

It means I'm human. 

I know, I know-- you're all like, 'Brenda did you hear her-- she's going to leave her kids and move to Cabo. How could she? My kids are my life. They are the air in which I breathe and need to survive." 

Yes, I do love my tiny people. Most moments of the day.

I know there are those out there who have it worse off than I do. I know there are couples who desperately want children and don't have any. Because of that, I'm not supposed to say "Hey, somedays this plain sucks.." because I have children. No. It doesn't mean that you can't feel that way. You're in the trenches folks. You're getting down and dirty with your tiny guerrillas. Guerrillas, not gorillas. That small independent group taking part in irregular fighting, typically against larger regular forces, the tiny resistant fighters that you brought into this world. 

You go ahead and feel however you need to. 

It doesn't make you ungrateful.
It makes you human. 

It doesn't mean your not sympathetic.
It means your human. 

Sometimes navigating motherhood feels like a room full of trap doors and my name is Alice but I'm not falling into Wonderland. 

The favorite pajamas are in the dirty pile at bedtime--trap door! 

The peanut butter and jelly has too much peanut butter and it's on the wrong color plate-- trap door! 

None of the other kids have to listen to their parents-- trap door! 

Why won't you let me have ice cream before dinner-- trap door! 

My sock is caught on a toenail that I won't let you clip-- trap door! 

You braided my hair the wrong way and now I look funny-- trap door! 

You just don't understand me-- trap door! 

To feel this way doesn't make us less than.
It makes us human.

To feel this way doesn't mean we're going to give up.
It means we're human. 

Moms are often told that they are superheroes and in most cases we are but we are also just plain old human beings, with real human feelings and life with our tiny kin is hard. Hard with a capital 'H'. 

You think it. 

I think it. 

And sometimes, you need to say it. 

Out loud or in print. 

From a rooftop or from under your breath. 

It makes you human. 

Good days.

Bad days.

It all shapes us.